| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | MGM | MGM Syndrome (as In The Movie Maker) - Faker Putting On A Real Good Show |
| FINE | F*cked Up , Insecure, Neurotic & Emotional |
| WNL | Will Not Listen; Patient Won't Take Medical Advice |
| SFSF | Sphincter Factor Scale: 1 To 10 Scale Indicating Degree Of Bowel-loosening In Response To An Emergency |
| FURB | Funny, Unusual, Rectal Blockage (people Who Use Inappropriate Objects To Insert Into The Rectum) |
| RTTL | Running Towards The Light - Dying |
| TWSAM | Trash Will Survive And Multiply |
| GTMJACB | Gone To Meet Jesus, Ain't Coming Back (dead) |
| YMRASU | Your Medical Records Are Screwed Up |
| EI | Eating In - Intravenous Feeding |
| NFS | Neuro-faecal Syndrome - Sh*t For Brains |
| MUH | Messed Up Heart |
| GOK | God Only Knows |
| C/C | Cancel Christmas (dead) |
| PCUINIA | Please Consult Us If New (Surgical) Issues Arise - I.e. Please Never Page Me Again |
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