| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | SHAD | Syphilitic, Hypochondriac, Alcoholic Degenerate |
| EMS | Earn Money Sleeping (joke At Expense Of Emergency Medical Service) |
| FIRT | Failed Impact Resistance Test (crash Victim) |
| MAFAT | Mandatory Anasthaesia F**k Around Time, Precedes Any Incision |
| EMT | Extraordinary Masochistic Tendencies (joke At Expense Of Emergency Medical Technicians) |
| GTG | Go To Ground - Fall Out Of Bed Or Chair |
| NQRITH | Not Quite Right In The Head |
| HOP | House Of Pain (nursing Home) |
| TAPS | Thick As Pig Sh*t |
| ESBAM | Eat Shit And Bark At The Moon (or "not Bloody Likely" In UK English) |
| C2 | A "can't C**t"; Lazy Physician Who Passes Off Work To Colleagues And Often Whines |
| UBI | Unexplained Beer Injury |
| SWW | Sick, Wet And Whiny (infant) |
| LGFTC | Looks Good From The Corridor (but Not Closely Examined) |
| P4P | Penicillin For Prick (peniecille For Penile Discharge) |
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