| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | BOHICA | Bend Over, Here It Comes Again |
| RBG | Received By God (a Person In Receipt Of A Celestial Transfer) |
| FURB | Funny, Unusual, Rectal Blockage (people Who Use Inappropriate Objects To Insert Into The Rectum) |
| EMT | Extraordinary Masochistic Tendencies (joke At Expense Of Emergency Medical Technicians) |
| PLTDP | Practice Limited To Dead People |
| SIO | Sleeping It Off |
| GOA | Gone On Arrival (police Turn Up, Ambulance Turns Up, Fire Brigade Turns Up, Patient Doesn't) |
| CFT | Chronic Food Toxicity I.e. Obesity |
| FIT | Fart In Transit (gas Seen In The Intestines On An Abdominal Film) |
| DSB | Drug-Seeking Behaviour (faking Illness To Fuel Narcotic Addiction) |
| PRATFO | Patient Reassured And Told To F*** Off |
| TCLT | Transcranial Lead Therapy - Gunshot Wound Passing Through Head |
| JNR | Just Not Right (something Is Wrong, But No Diagnosis Has Been Made Yet) |
| PAAF | Pissed As A Fart (also PIAF -PIssed As A Fart) |
| LOL | Little Old Lady |
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