| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | ALS | Absolute Loss Of Sanity (nutcase) |
 | GTG | Go To Ground - Fall Out Of Bed Or Chair |
 | CTD | Circling The Drain (Close To Death) |
 | SOB | Silly Old Bugger / B*stard / Bitch |
 | DUB | Damn Ugly Baby |
 | TCS | Toxic Confusional State - Confused, Usually Elderly, Person Whose Problem Is Due To Constipation (toxic Build Up In Body) |
 | CBT | Chronic Burger/Biscuit Toxicity (obesity) |
 | TTR | (US) Tattoo-to-Tooth Ratio (Dirtbag Ratio) |
 | CPM | Calcified Penisitis Morbidium - Male Patient Whose Ailment Is Due To Excessive Or Unprotected Sex |
 | TAPS | Thick As Pig Sh*t |
 | PBS | Pretty Bad Shape |
 | HTD | Higher Than A Duck |
 | DFO | Drunk And Fell Over |
 | BWCO | Baby Won't Come Out (needs Caesarian) |
 | GTMJACB | Gone To Meet Jesus, Ain't Coming Back (dead) |