| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | ALS | Absolute Loss Of Sanity (nutcase) |
| GTG | Go To Ground - Fall Out Of Bed Or Chair |
| CTD | Circling The Drain (Close To Death) |
| SOB | Silly Old Bugger / B*stard / Bitch |
| DUB | Damn Ugly Baby |
| TCS | Toxic Confusional State - Confused, Usually Elderly, Person Whose Problem Is Due To Constipation (toxic Build Up In Body) |
| CBT | Chronic Burger/Biscuit Toxicity (obesity) |
| TTR | (US) Tattoo-to-Tooth Ratio (Dirtbag Ratio) |
| CPM | Calcified Penisitis Morbidium - Male Patient Whose Ailment Is Due To Excessive Or Unprotected Sex |
| TAPS | Thick As Pig Sh*t |
| PBS | Pretty Bad Shape |
| HTD | Higher Than A Duck |
| DFO | Drunk And Fell Over |
| BWCO | Baby Won't Come Out (needs Caesarian) |
| GTMJACB | Gone To Meet Jesus, Ain't Coming Back (dead) |
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