| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | DILF | Doctor I'd Like To F*** (Fornicate With): Nursing Slang For Good-looking Doctor |
| TEC | Transfer To Eternal Care I.e. Dead |
| COSMONAUT | Cat Owner, Smells, Made Of Nuts And Used Tampons ("mad Cat Lady" With Poor Hygiene And Body Odour) |
| HVLT | High Velocity Lead Poisoning: Gunshot Wound |
| WNL | Will Not Listen; Patient Won't Take Medical Advice |
| GUCCI | Genito-Urinary Clinc, Chlamydial Infection (posh Female With Sexually Transmitted Chlamydial Infection) |
| PITA | Pain In The Ass |
| ERCP | Emergency Retrograde Clerking Of Patient, An Emergency Procedure Before The Consultant Rounds |
| BMW | Bitch Moan & Whine |
| SRI | Something Wrong Inside (undiagnosable Problem) |
| WWI | Walking While Intoxicated (and Fell Over) |
| CTD | Circling The Drain (Close To Death) |
| TARFU | Things Are Really F*cked Up |
| FLK W/ GLM | Funny Looking Kid With A Good Looking Mother |
| DSB | Drug-Seeking Behaviour (faking Illness To Fuel Narcotic Addiction) |
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