| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | TFO | Too F*cking Old (person Dying Of Old Age). |
| D&D | Divorced And Desperate (middle Aged Female Who Visits Doctor Weekly Just For Male Attention) |
| FFDIG | Found Face Down In Gutter |
| DILF | Doctor I'd Like To F*** (Fornicate With): Nursing Slang For Good-looking Doctor |
| GROLIES | (UK) Guardian Reader Of Low Intellect In Ethnic Skirt |
| TOG | Tears Of Gratitude |
| TDS | Terminal Deceleration Syndrome (e.g. RTA Death, High-rise Syndrome, Jump-suicides And Parachute-failed-to-open) |
| DBI | Dirt Bag Index: Number Of Tattoos X Number Of Missing Teeth = Days Since The Patient Last Bathed |
| OTDPDS | Out The Door Pretty Damn Soon |
| SBI | Something Bad Inside E.g. Undiagnosed Cancer/unexpected Serious Condition Found When Performing Surgery |
| HSPL | High Serum Porcelain Level - Patient Is A Crock Of Sh*t |
| RUTUS | Rounding Up The Usual Suspects - Ordering A Set Of Tests For A Given Set Of Symptoms |
| NKDA | Not Known, Didn't Ask |
| TLC | Tube, Lavage & Charcoal (given To Poisoning Victim) |
| UFO | Unidentified Frozen Object: Unidentified Dead Homeless Person In The Winter |
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