| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | SBLEO | (pronounced S-B-Leo) Suicide By Law Enforcement Officer |
| PP | Plank Positive - Stupid, As In "thick As 2 Short Planks" |
| MICOS | Masterly Inactivity, Cat-like Observation And Steroids |
| HMF | Hysterical Mother Figure |
| FOS | Full Of Sh*t (either Severely Constipated Or Metaphorically) |
| TWSAM | Trash Will Survive And Multiply |
| GDA | Gonna Die Anyway |
| WAFTAM | ("woff-tam"): Waste Of F***ing Time And Money |
| ELFS | Evil Little F*ckers (irritating Children) |
| DQ | Drama Queen |
| GPH | Goddamns Per Hour |
| FES | Fluttering Eye Syndrome - Patient Faking Unconsciousness |
| AOB | Alcohol On Board |
| SYB | Save Your Breath (for Patients Who Don't Take Advice) |
| JPS | Just Plain Stupid (self Induced Injury Involving Lack Of Common Sense) |
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