| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | SOG | Sick Old Guy (male Version Of LOL (Little Old Lady)) |
| GOA | Gone On Arrival (police Turn Up, Ambulance Turns Up, Fire Brigade Turns Up, Patient Doesn't) |
| HMF | Hysterical Mother Figure |
| POPTA | Passed Out Prior To Arrival |
| BTSOOM | Beats The Shit Out Of Me |
| SVRI | Something Very Wrong Inside (usually Terminal) |
| PRATFO | Patient Reassured And Told To F*** Off |
| FES | Fluttering Eye Syndrome - Patient Faking Unconsciousness |
| C/C | Cancel Christmas (dead) |
| TMI | Three Meaningless Initials (e.g. John Smith, TMI - Applied To Medics With Qualifications Rather Than Ability) |
| PHS | Positive Hilton Sign - Demanding Patient Expects Hilton Hotel Luxury; Indicates Patient Well Enough To Leave! |
| FINE | F*cked Up , Insecure, Neurotic & Emotional |
| BMT | Bowel-Movement Taco (faecal Matter Trapped In Female Genitalia) |
| LOLFDGB | Little Old Lady, Fall Down, Go Boom |
| GOL | Gone Off Legs (see FOL) |
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