| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | HOP | House Of Pain (nursing Home) |
| BVA | Breathing Valuable Air |
| FLB | Funny Little Bumps (unexplained Skin Bumps) |
| JAFFA | Just Another Fat, F***ing Assh*le |
| SYB | Save Your Breath (for Patients Who Don't Take Advice) |
| PPPPP | Piss Poor Protoplasm Poorly Put-together (really Old And / Or Decrepit) |
| PCUINIA | Please Consult Us If New (Surgical) Issues Arise - I.e. Please Never Page Me Again |
| FINE | F*cked Up , Insecure, Neurotic & Emotional |
| MTF | Metabolize To Freedom (i.e. Let The Person Sober Up, And Then They Can Leave) |
| NPS | New Parent Syndrome |
| TTOAST | Take Them Out And Shoot Them |
| GTO | Gomer Tip Over (elderly Person With Injury From Trip Or Fall) |
| DTMA | Don't Transfer To Me Again. |
| CSD | Chronic Slapping Deficiency - Annoying/unruly Family Members Hitting Nurse's Call Button Every 5 Minutes With Minor Requests/inane Questions Or For Fun |
| TEETH | Tried Everything Else, Try Homeopathy |
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