| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | FD | F*cking Drunk |
| HOP | House Of Pain (nursing Home) |
| RT | Room Temperature (dead) |
| PHAT | Pretty Hot And Tempting (warning To Others) |
| JAR | JAR Syndrome: Just Ain't Right (often Used When A Patient Has Multiple Issues) |
| D&D | Divorced And Desperate (middle Aged Female Who Visits Doctor Weekly Just For Male Attention) |
| TEETH | Tried Everything Else, Try Homeopathy |
| AE | Aggressive Euthanasia - A Procedure That Obnoxious Patients Would Benefit From. |
| ATS | Acute Thespian Syndrome: Faking Illness; Known In US As MGM Syndrome |
| PFO | Pissed (Drunk) And Fell Over |
| JIC | Jesus Is Calling |
| PDSD | Pre-Detention Stress Disorder - A Person Who Feigns Medical Symptoms When Police Handcuff Him |
| GLM | Good Looking Mum |
| FIDO | F*ck It, Drive On (a Waste Of Time/hoax Ambulance Call) |
| SHS | Sullen, Hostile, Stupid (often An Inner City Drug/alcohol Addict) |
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