| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | D&D | Divorced And Desperate (middle Aged Female Who Visits Doctor Weekly Just For Male Attention) |
| IHC | Improving His Claim - Victim Of Minor Accident, Needs No Treatment But Wants Something To Support His Insurance/legal Claim. |
| MILF | Mother I'd Like To F**k. US Version Of GLM Who Is Also PHAT |
| VAC | Vultures Are Circling (dying) |
| DENTIST | Doesn't Even Need Treatment - It's Sorted, Truly |
| MIDI | Myocardial Infarction During Intercourse (heart Attack During Sex) |
| TWSAM | Trash Will Survive And Multiply |
| GOLP | Generalised Old Lady Pains |
| SPAK | Status Post Ass Kicking |
| MFB | Measure For Box (coffin) |
| MICOS | Masterly Inactivity, Cat-like Observation And Steroids |
| SBOD | Stupid Bitch / Bastard On Drugs |
| NFS | Neuro-faecal Syndrome - Sh*t For Brains |
| SNUD | Sick Nigh Unto Death |
| LOL | Little Old Lady |
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