| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | APTFRAN | Apply Pillow To Face, Repeat As Necessary (for Annoying Patient) |
| HST | High Slug Titre - Lazy Patient (slug) That Won't Get Out Of Bed |
| TCLT | Transcranial Lead Therapy - Gunshot Wound Passing Through Head |
| CRAFT | Can't Remember A Fucking Thing |
| LGFD | Looks Good From Door (but Not Closely Examined) |
| BIT | Burp In Transit (gas Seen In The Stomach On An Abdominal Film) |
| FPO | For Practice Only (FTD) |
| VIP | Very Intoxicated Person |
| CF | Cockroach Factor - A Patient's Ability To Survive Trauma Or Serious Treatment Is Inversely Proportional To His Contribution To Society. |
| OBE | Open Both Ends (known In UK As DNV - Diarrhoea And Vomiting) |
| PIAF | PIssed As A Fart (drunk) (also PAAF -Pissed As A Fart) |
| TWA | Third World Assassins. Slang For The Allegedly Poor Medical Care Delivered By Physicians Who Went To Medical School In Foreign Countries |
| HTK | Higher Than A Kite |
| NSA | Non-Standard Appearance (what A FLK Grows Into) |
| POMT | Please Optimize Medical Treatment - Don't Call Us Until You've Done Your Job First |
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