| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | LMC | Low Marble Count (low IQ) |
| CAT6 | Triage Is Cat 1 (major) To Cat 5 (minor) So Cat 6 Means A Timewaster |
| ALS | Absolute Loss Of Sanity (nutcase) |
| GOL | Gone Off Legs (see FOL) |
| VBA | Valuable Breathing Air; I.e. What Some Patients Or Doctors Are Wasting |
| FDSTW | Found Dead Stayed That Way |
| GORK | God Only Really Knows |
| FUBIL | F*ck You Buddy, I'm Leaving. The Act Of A Doctor At A Small Hospital Dumping A Critically Ill Patient On Larger Hospital On Friday Afternoon Before He Leaves For The Weekend. |
| IFOI | "I Fell On It" - (also Eiffel Syndrome) Universal Explanation Given By A Patient With A Foreign Object In The Rectum |
| PAFO | Pissed [Drunk] And Fell Over |
| POMT | Please Optimize Medical Treatment - Don't Call Us Until You've Done Your Job First |
| DIDC | Dose Of I Don't Care - Pain-killing Meds That Make Patient Light-headed |
| RTTL | Running Towards The Light - Dying |
| UDI | Unidentified Drinking Injury |
| JNR | Just Not Right (something Is Wrong, But No Diagnosis Has Been Made Yet) |
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