| Abbreviations | Meaning |
 | HIBGIA | Had It Before, Got It Again |
| MFD | Measure For Dispatch (coffin), (severely Ill Or Dying) |
| SBA | Silver Bracelet Award - Patient Is A Prisoner Brought In Wearing Cuffs |
| FLUF | Funny Little Ugly F*cker |
| TTTR | Tooth To Tattoo Ratio - Visual Determination Of Basic Intelligence. A Positive Ratio (more Teeth Then Tattoos) Is Generally Better Than A Negative Ratio, Which Is Bad. |
| ERNOBW | Engine Running, No One Behind The Wheel (questionable IQ) |
| CKS | Cute Kid Syndrome |
| NARS | Not A Rocket Scientist (low IQ) |
| SYB | Save Your Breath (for Patients Who Don't Take Advice) |
| LGFD | Looks Good From Door (but Not Closely Examined) |
| SWI | Something Wrong Inside |
| PP | Plank Positive - Stupid, As In "thick As 2 Short Planks" |
| TFTB | Too Fat To Breathe |
| DBI | Dirt Bag Index: Number Of Tattoos X Number Of Missing Teeth = Days Since The Patient Last Bathed |
| SFS | Stinky Foot Syndrome (often Related To Homeless) |
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